The B word and the M word.

I walked up to my husband with a determined mind. Enough was enough.

Many a times he had been careless about it and many a times I had suffered it’s repercussions and the aftermath. As he frowned intently at the screen of his laptop, one finger about to press send to a work email, I confronted him.

‘From now on you cannot use the B word or the M word in front of our baby.’

My husband’s finger froze in mid-air, email forgotten, and a look of shock spread across his face.

‘Huh? What? I’ve never sworn at you and I can’t imagine swearing in front of her at all!’ he defended himself hotly.

I frowned, taking a step back and then laughed. My husband viewed me with caution as if staring at a volcano which might or might not erupt at any moment.

‘I meant the words – Biscuit or Milk.’ I clarified. ‘She’s begun to recognise words now. She wants both these things any time of the day if you mention it even once. I want her to eat healthy meals not just….’

‘Sal…’ my husband interrupted, his eyes darting from me to baby and then back.


He pointed at her.

It was too late. I turned around to see the baby point dangerously with forceful little shrieks. I was directed by the point to the specific cupboard that had the specific biscuit packet. The rich tea ones she wasn’t supposed to have.

I directed an accusing glare at my husband. He gave me a smug look wagging a finger at me, ‘Shouldn’t have used the B word.’

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